With loves, eileen

I received his missed call, I didn't pick up his phone because I didn't bring my phone to college.
My phone was dead that morning. Curious to see his call after a long period. I texted him when I saw his missed called, and asked what's going on. He said he had something to tell me but he rather speak on phone instead of texting me, as he said it was hard to explain in message.

So, i waited his call,and he was weird.I felt that. He asked whether im ready to listen to him. I said yes in an odd way. Then he started his story.He told me how he felt to me, how he shared his thought to his friends and a lot more. He wanted me to know what he felt now and wanted to know my response.

Why you told me so suddenly?I didnt know how to react and response to you after I heard what you said to me. My mind was totally blank.Pooff~ That's why I texted you, not continue listening to you on the phone.

I'm so sorry.All I can say to you is sorry. I admit I have feeling for you during the three months, but that's just a touch.Not so deep.I'm sorry if I did anything wrong when we were still friends. I didnt know you'll fall into me, seriously. I didnt realized that you've been watching me since we met each other, until you told me that day. You told me your friends said its hard to have chinese girl.It's true. I'm happy with you during the three months. Watched you laughing during class, playing around with your friends, your serious look when we given task or activities to do. And, I liked to see you playing sepak takraw every evening.

Still remembered when we were having class that morning, my friend told me that you look like sunshine boy when you smiled.I agreed.I decided to close to you and chat with you during class. Try to talk with you and get to know you well. Remember when you shared your mp3 with me?That's the first time I sat so close beside you, at the corner of the class, circled the scarf around my head.Scared teacher noticed me listening to the mp3. And once, you taught me how to fold ketupat and grasshopper using long leaves that you plucked outside the class.Once more, you hold my hand tight with the ice cube. Three times you did this to me. Ice cube in my hand, and you acted like giving me the ice, but you actually wanted to hold my hand. I was stupid that time, didnt really know why you did this to me.

I didn't mean to hurt you.Long distance is not only the reason, communication also is the problem. Its hard for me to communicate with you if we really be together. I tried to listen so carefully when you phoned me or talked to me. Its hard to explain and I dont want you to waste your time on me. It's the past and its just a part of our memories. It doesnt mean we have to be together to end the story of us. The best way is to let go the past memories and think of our future life, not trying to combine the past and the future. Please let go,Davis. Sorry.


p/s. I'll remember you as a part of my memory. (: